LOSING MY SENSES

Longevity runs in my family, but I'm wondering if that's a good thing. Already I'm losing my memory, my eyesight and my hearing. I can no longer read the digital clock on the microwave while sitting in my favorite reading chair about six yards away. And after a trip to the grocery store today, I was reminded how my memory and hearing are failing me.

First I ran into my niece's new husband, Dustin, near the Deli counter. They were just married yesterday. We chatted for a while and as I walked away he said something I didn't quite hear and couldn't understand. As I tried to make sense of his words, I realized he said he was heading home to open wedding gifts. But by the time I figured out what he said he had already yelled, "See ya later" and the conversation was over.

Then a woman stopped me in the cookie aisle, looking at me as if she knew me. Her face was familiar, but I couldn't remember where I had met her, what her name was or anything about her. This is still bothering me! She talked about my son, Kody and how much he grew. Apparently she had seen him somewhere recently. I just shook my head and pretended I knew who she was, hoping she would give me some kind of hint as we chatted.

"I hate when that happens," I said to my husband that evening. "Her face was so familiar but I can't recall who she is." I suggested that next time I should just be honest and say, "This is embarrassing, but I can't remember how I know you." My husband rolled his eyes and said, "I think I'd rather just be frustrated about it."

I suppose saying that would make a person feel unimportant and forgettable, but maybe she would have appreciated my honesty more than my pretending that I knew her. I think I would be okay with someone telling me that I'm forgettable if they said it in a kind way.

It's funny that I experienced this in a grocery store because the one sense that I wish I could lose, my sense of taste, is still as sharp as ever.

This all reminds me of a joke I heard recently about an eighty-year-old woman who got pregnant and had a baby. Her friends just couldn't believe this and they went to visit her soon after she came home from the hospital. The woman wasn't eager to show them the child so they kept saying, "We came to see the baby," hoping she would take the hint. Finally, one of the friends couldn't stand it anymore and she insisted, "Please, we came to see the baby!" The elderly new mother took a deep breath, set down her tea cup and said, "Well if you can stay until he starts to cry because I can't remember where I put him."

One thing I hope I never lose is my sense of humor. I'll take blind deaf and dumb as long as I can laugh.