JUST THE WAY I AM

By Danelle Carvell
Sometimes I think that being organized is over-rated. People who are very organized almost seem to get no joy out of life. They are never spontaneous and they are so into precision and perfection that they miss the human side of life. There are days when I wish I could be more organized, but when I see the people who are, I kind of like me the way I am.

Although I know all the tips and tricks to being organized as I've shared a few in my past blogs, my husband tells me that I have no management skills. Yesterday he woke me from a nap after I stayed up all night making pillows. His important question was, "Do you want this magazine? It's garbage night." Disturb a sleeping person for the sake of one less magazine in the house. Sorry, I can't relate to that kind of thinking. It wouldn't even cross my mind to wake someone just to ask them about potential garbage.

I guess we all have our quirks. My husband is too rigid and I'm too carefree perhaps. Could be why God put us together. But our differences are often a source of contention in the home and it leaves me feeling less than adequate. Right now I have laundry to do, the refrigerator to clean, and a long list of things I should accomplish today, but my heart is here at my keyboard. I woke up this morning and read the Bible but I couldn't really focus on God's word. My brain felt restless, unable to concentrate on any one thing. I told God that I feel like a mess sometimes and I asked Him to help me be more organized and disciplined so I could feel more together.

Do you know what His answer was? "I know you completely, Danelle, and I love you just the way you are." Oh I want to cry right now. That is love! In a world where people are so critical of each other and always focusing on the negative, I have a God who loves me just the way I am. Yippeeee!!

When I was younger, I was very influenced by what others thought of me. I needed the approval of my husband and everyone around me that I cared about. If someone said something hurtful to me, I could go into a depression that would last for days. But since I've been putting God first in my life I've been set free from all that. His opinion of me is the only one I care about. Sure it's nice to receive compliments and know that people approve of the way I am, but I don't need it anymore. All I need is God's approval. And I think He's more impressed that I sat at my keyboard today and shared this than He would be if I cleaned the refrigerator.

My sister just called. We are so much alike. She told me that she has so much to do and doesn't feel like doing any of it. She wants to go shopping. I just love her and I love that she's spontaneous like that. I can't imagine her being any other way. I love her just the way she is.

I think we get into trouble when we expect others to be like us. When we push our personality traits on other people and expect them to be like we are, it's almost as if we are questioning the God who created them. I will never be super-organized and ultra-disciplined. I have a daily schedule on my bulletin board that I try to follow, but some days it just doesn't happen. I can't be like my husband and he shouldn't expect me to have the management skills that he has.

When he told me I have no management skills, I shot back, "Well I wouldn't want to manage anything if it meant I had to be like you!" I even went so far as to suggest that the bulb in his sun lamp must have gone bad because he's been crabby lately. See how we tear each other down with our differences. But God never does that. He cherishes our differences.

When you feel like no one appreciates who you are and no one seems to have a kind word, remember that God knows you completely and loves you just the way you are.

The She Speaks Conference is about women connecting the hearts of women to the heart of our Father God and that your heart is to serve Him and His daughters, as He leads.
http://www.aholyexperience.com/2011/03/how-christians-create-art-she-speaks-scholarship/
http://shespeaksconference.com/