Have you ever met a grouch? Maybe you work for one. Maybe you live with one. Today's world has its share of grouches. Although I'm sure we've always had grouches, they seem more prevalent today than years ago. For example, did we ever hear the term road rage in the 80's? Drivers had more patience back then. They were more restrained and less inclined to shout obscenities out the window toward other drivers.
Our world becomes more stressful with each passing decade, and it's more likely than ever that you will come across a grouch in your every day encounters. Grouches often reveal themselves while standing in long lines. They show their true colors when they attempt to do something frustrating. If things don't go their way, they lose patience and spew their venom out on whoever is around. And they have no idea how stupid they make themselves look.
At first I thought that I shouldn't use the word stupid. I thought that perhaps stupid is too strong a word. But I decided that it's the perfect word for behavior that allows emotions to control our actions. We all lose it once in a while. Life is stressful today. But the kind of grouchiness I'm talking about is the nasty kind that loves to make demands, to demean and belittle people. Never does anyone look more senseless than when they are ranting and raving about something they're not pleased with and doing it in such a way that they appear downright mean.
Possibly the best example of this can be found on reality television. Although it might be entertaining to watch adults bicker and scream, I can't help but form an instant opinion about those people. For example, I wouldn't want to come within 100 yards of Jake Pavelka from The Bachelor. The last time I saw him on TV, he was saying something about wishing a certain girl would fall to her death. That is a terrible thing to say.! Don't people have a conscience anymore? Why would anyone say something like that publicly? What sane woman would want to date a man like that? I guess the stupid ones.
The question I'm pondering is "How can we respond to a grouch in a way that will make him or her less grouchy?" We could ask Abraham Lincoln if he were alive. His wife Mary was an incredibly contentious woman. It's said that he walked around the white house with dollar bills in his pocket, bribing the staff to stay on. She would often interrupt her husband's meetings to rant and rave about her concerns.
Yet Lincoln seemed so calm in his mannerisms from what I've read about him. Lincoln's marriage to Mary was the perfect training ground for all the stress he would endure as commander-in-chief of the civil war. He had battled a war in his own home every day for years. Yet he stayed devoted to Mary. She sharpened his patience, his endurance, and his determination to see a thing through.
We could learn a lot from Honest Abe. Perhaps grouchy people were put on this earth to shape our character. While they might look stupid being their grouchy selves, we can appear even more stupid if we allow ourselves to be pulled into their fussing so much that we participate in their rants. The best way to handle a grouch is to remain calm. We can't overcome bad behavior when we allow grouchy people to bring out the grouch in us.
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