WHAT DO YOU WANT THAT IS DIFFERENT?

                                                                                

My daughter got me an apron for Christmas after seeing my new-found love for cooking. We often go through seasons when we need something different. But different isn't better...unless it is what we are meant to have.

When I read something profound that I might use in a future post, I write it down. I have notebooks filled with future writing topics, good quotes and advice from anyone who speaks to my heart. If I hear something that should be remembered or shared, I write it down. Today I was flipping through one of my notebooks and came across two pages of entries that didn't seem to fit together because of the varied topics. But everything listed was something worth sharing. 

I don't always right down the source of my scribbled notes and quotes. So when I share it, I often have to change the words so I'm not guilty of copying someone else's thoughts from a book, magazine or wherever I saw it. The notes I came across recently could fit under the category of simple advice about life and the pursuit of happiness, so maybe they do fit together. 

The first thing on the list is sort of a recipe for well-being. It's actually a list of things that define our search for happiness. "Well-being (happiness) is a combination of love for what we do each day, the quality of our relationships, the security of our finances, our physical health and what we contribute to our community." The only thing I would add to that is knowing how much God loves you and pursuing that love through prayer and reading His word. That is the most important thing in my opinion. 

Love for what we do each day 

People who work more that 20 hours a week need a job that fills their strengths. It's difficult to enjoy a job if you are not doing something that you are naturally equipped to do. We all have strengths and weaknesses. One of my weaknesses is technology. Computer work frustrates me. My most stressful jobs have been those that involved learning work on a computer. 

I sometimes think I should have gone to culinary school or learned to be a pastry chef. I enjoy creating things. Writing is a creative outlet and the computer requirement is not difficult. What's difficult is making money as a writer. I have been paid for many writing assignments, but it was never enough to live on. Many artistic people have a hard time paying bills with the finished work of their creativity. That is where the phrase, "starving artist" comes from. It's just the way life is. 

Many people are stuck in jobs they hate because that job pays the bills. But their hearts are longing to do something else, something they love. People do manage to find work that they love while making enough money to live comfortably, but that seems to be a rarity from what I've seen. 

If you are looking to make a job change, I would advise you to ask God to reveal where you should be. Most people look for jobs based on their qualifications and they let God out of it. Perhaps that is where they go wrong time and time again. God can bring opportunities that are perfectly suited to your gifts, talents, strengths and abilities. He knows what gets you excited. He knows the things you love to talk about and what gifts he has equipped you with that could be used in the workplace. 

Pray to the purpose maker, and then be attentive for His answer. Look for signs of Him directing you toward a certain type of job or a particular place of employment. Letting God out of your job search means settling for less than His best for you. 

The quality of our relationships

Life is lonely without relationships. The world is filled with a lot of lonely people. How many songs have been written about the age-old problem of loneliness? But even if you talk to hundreds of people each day, you can still end up feeling lonely. Getting married doesn't always solve loneliness. Because it is the quality of our relationships that make us happy and less lonely. 

How do we improve our relationships with people or even find good people to have relationships with? That takes effort, it doesn't just happen. Two people in my family are married to someone they met on a dating app. I would not rule that out. God brings people together in many different ways. If I were looking, I would take advantage of all those ways. Meeting someone by a chance encounter is difficult because too many people walk right past you without saying a word. You have to talk to someone before you can start a relationship with that person. 

I know someone who prayed very emotionally for her husband when she reached a point of knowing her present relationship had no future. That prayer was answered very quickly and she is quite happy today.  If I were lonely, I would use every available possibility for meeting the right person. If that meant getting out of the house, I would go. If it meant putting up an online dating profile, I would do it. One thing I would not leave out is praying about it. I have seen so many examples of God bringing people together that can't be denied. But only praying people can see evidence of their prayers being answered. If you don't pray, you haven't earned the right to comment on its power. 

As far as improving already-established relationships, I think an important factor in that is forgiveness. Too many people have an unforgiving spirit and it makes their lives miserable. The thing about holding grudges is the way it affects the person who is hanging on to that hurt. The Bible contains many warnings about having an angry, unforgiving heart and all the problems that will invade your life when you do that. 

I know from experience how unforgiveness can make your life unbearably miserable. It can completely destroy everything good in your life. It can turn you into someone you don't even recognize. It can lead you down a path you never expected to go and burn bridges you can never cross again. It might be the greatest destroyer of relationships that there is. Forgiveness is often the first step toward improving a relationship. And one thing that makes forgiveness easier is a heart-felt apology. It is our own pride that is the greatest destroyer of relationships. We can't admit when we hurt someone and we can't forgive when we've been hurt.

Knowing how much God loves us and pursuing that love

My worth is defined by God. It is not defined by what I do, how much money I make, the car I drive, the house I live in, the way I look or the clothes I wear. My appearance and achievements are not what make me a valuable, worthy person. I shouldn't need applause from others to feel like someone special. But I didn't always know that. 

I didn't always know that my greatest purpose on earth is to glorify Him, even when I fail. The reason why I'm so open about my failures is because I don't care how people see me and I don't need their applause. Right now I am unemployed and I have been unemployed for more than a year. Covid pretty much stole my job from me when I stood up for my rights. But I have no regrets. I know that God is preparing me for something amazing, and the tough season I'm in right now is only temporary. 

People who know "why" they are living can tolerate almost any "how" they are living. In other words, every difficulty in life can be overcome when we stop relying on our own strength. When I see someone who seems broken and lost, there is always one thing lacking in that person's life. It is the same one problem, time and time again. Until you realize how much God loves you and you seriously begin to pursue that love, you will continue to feel broken and lost. You will repeat the same patterns and experience the same disappointments over and over. 

What do you want that is different? Perhaps you need to do something different to get it.