WHY TEXTING IS THE WORST

By Danelle Carvell

                                                    

Jesus gave us one rule: Communicate in love

Texting can be useful in certain situations, but as a form of communication during a conflict, texting is the worst choice. Our culture has changed a lot since social media. Our ways of communicating have changed. And change isn't always good. 

People today feel free to say whatever they want because it feels safe to dart a text at someone and say things you would not have the courage to say in-person. Social media and texting have damaged our culture by making it easier to say mean things and bully people.

I've made mistakes too with texting and posting things on Facebook. One mistake I have made is using Facebook as a place to vent. Leaving nasty messages for people you don't agree with on Facebook is childish. Tearing people down in public is not the biblical way to resolve conflict. 

I believe that God commands a face-to-face meeting when we need to confront someone because it is the best way to clearly communicate. When someone receives your text, he can't see your facial expressions and body language. He can't hear your tone of voice. So your text could easily be misunderstood, which will make matters worse. 

If I don't have the courage to talk to that person privately, why should I take it public? Isn't that the gossip we are warned about in the Bible. 

Being mean on Facebook will always come back to haunt you. You ruin your own reputation for one thing. Among the many ways a bad reputation hurts you is this example--a potential employer might see your Facebook manners and reject your job application. Your Facebook posts represent you. They represent your character. You should guard your reputation like it's gold. 

Texting is great for quick messages such as, "I'm here. Text me when you get here." If that's all you needed to say, a phone call wasn't necessary. It's also great when a conflict is still raw and lingering emotions have made things too uncomfortable for discussions in-person or by phone. And that is when we especially need to use caution. 

Whatever it is that you need to communicate, and whatever form of communication you choose, the most important thing is to communicate with love. You won't get a good response if you come across as hostile and impatient when you confront someone. A soft answer turns away wrath. Hostility provokes it. 

The Bible has some excellent advice that applies to this subject:

"I tell everyone among you not to think of himself more highly than he should think...love must be without hypocrisy. Detest evil; cling to what is good. Show family affection to one another with brotherly love. Outdo one another in showing honor...be patient in affliction...pursue hospitality. Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse...Be in agreement with one another. Do not be proud...Do not repay evil for evil...Try to do what is honorable...live at peace with everyone...do not avenge yourselves. Vengeance belongs to God."  Romans 12:3-19

Wow! There's a whole lot of godly wisdom in that scripture. How many conflicts could be avoided if we would take those words to heart and act on them?