By Danelle Carvell
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| Social media was not a thing in the seventies, and I wouldn't change a thing. |
Why do I always feel better when I take a break from social media? There was a time when social media didn't exist, but today, many people can't get through a day without it. But is it really good for us? Are there better things we could be doing with our time?
Growing evidence is being presented about the negative impact of social media on mental health. The US Surgeon General, Dr Vivek Murthy recently issued an advisory about the harmful effects of social media use among children and teens, including depression, anxiety, and sleep problems.
"Children are exposed to harmful content on social media, ranging from violent and sexual content, to bullying and harassment. And for far too many children, social media use is compromising their sleep and valuable in-person time with family and friends." said Murthy.
I was just saying to my husband yesterday that I would not want to be growing up in today's world. We were eating ice cream while sitting across from the place where Jim spent much of his childhood. It is now a fenced-in patch of grass, but when he was a kid, it was the Elizabethville swimming pool.
He told me that my childhood, growing up in Pillow, must have been boring because our town didn't have a pool. I argued that I wasn't bored ever. I had a sand box. We had horses at one time. I created board games. I pested my dad until he bought us a good-sized above ground swimming pool. Then the neighbor kids really showed up.
Our town friends, my siblings and I played games in the back yard. Some of them were original games we made up. I recall a game we called "Koogle," but I don't remember exactly how it was played, other than the wooden markers we placed around the yard, which we ran to when our turn came up. It was a weird form of baseball.
We did mischievous things like soap the windows of houses and cars around Halloween. We would sneak into the corn field and swipe a bunch of cobs, then bring them into our barn where we would sit around a big tub and shell the kernels off until our fingers were sore.
The neighbor kids were there to help because they, too, would use that supply of hard, dried kernels to throw against the doors and windows of our neighbor's homes during Trick-or-Treat week. A handful of corn forcefully propelled against a window makes quite a racket, and probably made people jump as they relaxed toward evening. Sometimes people would yell at us from their front doors and we would hide in a bush, holding back the laughter. The smart neighbors ignored us and we eventually left them alone.
We also did things like kicking out the street lights when they came on. We spent a lot of time in a certain mulberry bush when the berries were ripe. We had creeks to play in, a basketball court that also served as a tennis court, a playground with a dangerously-high sliding board, and lots of critters to collect such as tadpoles, frogs and lightning bugs.
We had bikes, scooters, hoola hoops, wagons, pogo-sticks, jump ropes, sidewalk chalk, jacks, and trees to climb. When it rained hard, we had huge puddles in our yard big enough to float a raft on. During winter the ponds would freeze at the end of town and ice skates were on every kid's Christmas list. The highlight of each year was the Pillow Carnival and we never missed watching the ferris wheel go up.
I'm glad I didn't have a phone back then. I'm grateful that I got through high school without the distraction of social media. We had real conversations with people who paid attention instead of scrolling. We spent our time being creative, being physically active and forming friendships in-person. I truly believe that my childhood would have been completely different if social media were a thing back then. My growing-up years would not have been better.
Social media has transformed the social lives of girls especially. They have put themselves onto platforms that prioritize social comparison and performance. Ninety-five percent of teens use social media for at least two hours a day. Mental health problems are worse among teen girls since the start of social media. There has been a marked rise in female high school students contemplating suicide.
An epidemic of mental illness began among American teens and teens around the world in the early 2010s'. That is the same year that the first smartphone with a front-facing camera came out. So within the following years, teen girls spent hours each day posting photos of themselves on Facebook and Instagram. They also spent time scrolling through the carefully-edited photos of other girls.
This constant comparison of ourselves with the appearances, performances and accomplishments of others is not a healthy thing to focus on daily. Unless you are grounded in the Lord and know who you are in Christ, you can easily be negatively affected by all that, especially if you are a child.
We waited longer than most people do to give our daughter a phone. We knew that once she had one, there would be no going back. But it's hard to explain to a child the things you are trying to protect her from. She sees only that you are depriving her of contact with her friends, not realizing how that could actually be a good thing. We really don't need to be in constant contact with anyone, except God.
And that is why I often put my phone in a drawer and don't pay much attention to it. There have been many days when I spent way too much time on Facebook. And I felt myself being affected by it in negative ways. I couldn't get the work done that I should have been accomplishing in a day, and I found myself comparing my life to the lives of other people, often feeling cheated or living a boring life in comparison.
I was allowing the enemy to distract me by the success of other people. I was focusing too much on their lives. Social media pulls my mind into unhealthy directions, and I need to get away from it at times to get my focus back on what truly matters in life.
So if you've been feeling blue lately or feeling like you need a change or you need something more exciting...If you feel unsatisfied with your life in any way, maybe what you need is a break from social media. Go outside and enjoy the beauty of God's creation. Plan to meet a friend for coffee and let your phone in your handbag.
Make it more of a habit to put your phone away and pay attention to the people and the things happening around you. When your face is in your phone, you miss what God wanted you to notice...things that would have refreshed your mind and brought peace to your soul. All those special moments in life that inspire us, have meaning, make us laugh, bring us joy and feed our souls can be easily missed if we let ourselves be distracted by screen time.
The good stuff in life happens off-screen, so step back into your own life and feed your soul.
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