Satisfied Book Trailer | Alyssa Bethke

This book, Satisfied, has inspired my next You Tube video, which I titled, "Nine Idols Women Chase." The things that we love and think about more than God can become idols in our lives. I will be sharing Alyssa's wisdom and adding comments and examples of my own as we explore the ways that women make idols of people and things, and how doing this can negatively affect our lives and the lives of our family members. 

Her book, Satisfied is not specifically about idols, but she did mention two things in the book that began to consume her life...shopping and social media. This is what sparked an idea for me to write about the things that women allow themselves to focus on too much. The list could have been longer than six, but maybe there's a part two in the future. 

CHANGING THE WORLD RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE: A BOOK REVIEW

                                                                                    

By Danelle Carvell

What would the world look like if we all made intentional efforts to bless one another?  

That is a question both asked and answered in Becky Kopitzke’s book, Generous Love:Discover the Joy of Living “Others First”. Reading it has encouraged me to love more generously and more purposefully. If there’s anything our broken world needs right now, it’s the healing balm of a basic lesson in loving people.

But why should you love and bless people? Kopitzke answers that question in Chapter 13, where she offers two answers: because God says so, and because it benefits you. When Jesus was asked to name the top commandment, he also offered two answers: Love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul and mind; and love your neighbor as yourself. 

If you’re a follower of Jesus, God expects you to be who you claim to be. According to the Bible, loving people is how we prove our love for God: “By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.” We can’t separate loving God from loving people. They are one and the same because God is the one who commands us to love others. 

In Chapter 14, And Because It Benefits You Too, Kopitzke explains the second reason why we should love and bless others. “True blessings are not granted with the intent of getting something in return,” she writes. But the Bible is clear that when we do what God commands us to do, we will be rewarded. 

In Proverbs we are told that those who are kind benefit themselves but the cruel bring ruin on themselves. It is the basic law of sowing and reaping spoken of in 2 Corinthians that comes into play. Being rewarded for obedience is part of God’s system, Kopitzke reminds us. But our rewards may not be what we expect. 

Yes, blessing others might directly result in financial gain, a dream job, a healing or a restored relationship, but the better gift is being filled with more of God. “When we receive more of God, we start thinking the way He thinks and wanting more of what He wants. He infuses us with deeper peace, firmer trust, and fuller joy,” Kopitzke writes. 

 Perhaps the best way to bless others is to pray for them. In her book, Kopitzke reminds us that you don’t even have to get out of bed to make yourself useful and help people. Prayer is the most powerful work a person can do. She also points out that prayer can be a negative thing when it’s used as a form of gossip or to scold or shame people. 

“We need to pray for Janice, I think her husband is having an affair.” A comment like that is just a sneaky way to gossip more than it is a genuine concern for Janice. I wouldn’t want my personal business advertised for the sake of prayer. Personal issues should always remain personal unless the person with the issue decides to make it public. We simply don’t have the right to make that decision for anyone. 

And then we have the prayer shamers: “I’m going to pray so you can get over this. It’s really not healthy for you to keep dwelling on it.” First of all, only the person who experienced the hurt has the right to determine the time frame for getting over something. We cross major boundaries when we determine that ourselves. We need to be careful about using prayer as a way to shame people. That’s not blessing them in any way. It only reveals our own mean spirit. 

Whenever I see or hear about people being mean, my first thought is always how unhappy they must be. Happy people have no reason to be mean. They want the best for others because they are content with their own lives. We may think that our mean words or actions are really just harmless, but God doesn’t see it that way. “Because any sin, no matter the size or shape or intention, is offensive to God,” Kopitzke reminds us. 

I love the title of Chapter 2: Why Are We So Stinking Selfish? She mentions self-absorption, pride, entitlement, envy, distractions and fatigue as the six common pitfalls of our sin nature that tempt us to think and act selfishly. When we don’t see beyond ourselves, we don’t think about what other people might be going through or what they might need. “And it’s awfully hard to bless someone you’re jealous of,” Kopitzke points out. But the most likely reason we fail to bless others is that we are just too darn tired because life is so busy and full of distractions. 

Along with our prayers, we can also bless people with our presence, our possessions, and our perspective. Do you realize that you can bless people simply by looking them in the eye when they speak? Kopitzke lists 50 ways to bless people within each of four categories: prayer, presence, possessions, and perspective. She offers a total of 200 ways we can encourage others and bless them by lifting their spirits while also lifting our own.

Some of the things on her list really jumped out at me:

Welcome an interruption as part of God’s plan for your day.

Smile at people.

When tempted to point out a person’s flaws, pray for God to help you recognize your own.

Be friendly to service people. Ask how their day is going. Thank them for the work they do.

Pray for bad drivers who cut you off. (I remind myself of the stupid things I’ve done while driving)

Listen more than you talk.

Drop off a gift basket for a single mom and her children (I would have loved this at one time).

Encourage your children’s God-given personality and interests.

But I think my favorite is this one: When your child needs your attention, but you’re engaged in a conversation, teach her to lay a hand on your arm. Place your hand on hers to acknowledge her request. Then finish your discussion before tending to your child. This allows you to bless the person you’re talking to with your undivided attention and shows your kids that you can be present for them and others at the same time. 

Blessing others is about respecting people as individual souls created by God. If we can’t bless our own children, then that’s where we need to start. The author says that we are all shamefully prone to ignoring other people. That’s why we need to make an intentional daily effort if we want to experience the joy of living “others first”. 

“Generous love is more than a singular act of kindness or an isolated whim of generosity. It’s a habit. A lifestyle. A (daily) choice,” says Kopitzke. I wonder how many opportunities I missed throughout my life to express love for the people God placed in my path. After reading this book, I don’t want to miss any more. Each of us has the power to change the world right where we are because the greatest change can begin with the smallest acts of kindness. 

A final quote from the author seems a fitting way to end this book review: “Every day, every hour is a gift from Him, the Creator of time and space. And He expects us to use it well.” 

I hope to be told someday that I used my time well.

MY NEXT GOOD READ

This is on my "want to read" list. My husband read it on Kindle and finished it in one day. He said he couldn't put it down. After he read it, he looked at things differently. I had a flower in a vase on the windowsill and he pointed out the three shades of purple and how each color perfectly blended into the next on every petal. "How can you look at this flower and not believe there's a creator?" he said.

Any book that makes me more aware of God is a good read. We watch Donna Rigney on You Tube. She has some amazing stories of Heaven and some encouraging advice for us in these troubled times we are living. 

 In Divine Encounters, Donna Rigney’s memorable spiritual journey balances visions of heaven and hell with compelling messages of faith and forgiveness. Donna eloquently expresses the words of Jesus, giving you the tools to forgive and overcome your most painful of wounds. Your faith will be broadened as you pray for peace and place your pains in the palms of Jesus; you will overcome temptation as you recall valuable biblical references and timeless biblical prophecies. You will overcome being chained by sin, temptation, anger, wrath, fear, bitterness and spiritual emptiness; you will win the battle against Satan’s influence.

Shirley Brosius: Announcing: The Birth of a Book

Shirley Brosius: Announcing: The Birth of a Book: Drum roll please! The book Janine Boyer, Kim Messinger and I wrote is now available. We’re holding a Book Launch Party on Saturday, Februar...

ARE YOU?

Are you praying (even fasting) today for America, for Israel and for the nations of the epicenter? Are you praying specifically for the Lord to raise up leaders who will get America back on the right track economically, spiritually and morally? Are you praying for a massive spiritual revival — a Third Great Awakening — that will turn hearts of millions back to true, sincere, saving faith in the Lord Jesus Christ and will once again make America the “shining city on a hill” she was for so long?

The blunt truth is this: We are in deep trouble as a nation. We are facing the horrific and accelerating breakdown of the family — infidelity, divorce, abuse. We are seeing accelerating apostasy within the Church. People are turning away from God, betraying family and friends and ignoring the life-changing message of the Bible.

Crime is surging, especially violent crime. The pornography industry now makes more than ABC, CBS and NBC combined. Our national debt has shot past $15 trillion — 100% of our GDP — and there is no end of runaway spending in sight. Washington and Wall Street are rife with corruption. The number one highest-grossing film in the nation right now is called The Devil Inside. Tragically, the list goes on.
http://flashtrafficblog.wordpress.com/2012/01/10/a-time-for-choosing-implosion-or-revival/

THE BUTTERFLY EFFECT book review

                                                     

"Every single thing you do matters.  You have been created as one of a kind.  You have been created in order to make a difference.  You have within you the power to change the world."
Andy Andrews

The Butterfly Effect shows how your everyday actions can make a difference for generations to come. Through inspiring stories, The Butterfly Effect, by Andy Andrews, shares the secret of a life of permanent purpose, where every decision and action you make in life matters, not only today, but for the future. 

When you understand that every action matters, every result of our actions immediately improves! A life of permanent purpose will make you a better parent, a better spouse and a more valuable friend. The Butterfly Effect illustrates the unique power of the individual. 

When Andy Andrews was 23, homeless and scared, he was given guidance by an old man named Jones: "When you know that everything matters...that every move counts as much as any other...you will begin living a life of permanent purpose, which will make you a better parent, a better spouse, and a more valuable friend.  Your productivity and financial success will soar to new heights while the old days of uncertainty, doubt, and depression fade into the past."


That conversation changed Andy Andrews.  It became the guiding force that produced the kind of author and speaker he has become.  
"When we understand that every action matters, every result of our actions immediately improves," said Andrews.  Our decisions become wiser and more cautious when we live a life of permanent purpose.  


If you're wondering how significant your life is or if you make a difference.  If you question whether the universe even notices your existence, then you should read this small but mighty book, The Butterfly Effect.

"In 1963, Edward Lorenz presented a hypothesis to the New York Academy of Science.  His theory, stated simply, was that:

A butterfly could flap its wings and set molecules of air in motion, which would move other molecules of air, in turn moving more molecules of air--eventually capable of starting a hurricane on the other side of the planet.


Lorenz and his ideas were literally laughed out of the conference...Therefore because of the idea's charm and intrigue, the so-called butterfly effect became a staple of science fiction, remaining for decades a combination of myth and legend spread only by comic books and bad movies."


More than 30 years later, physics professors working from colleges and universities worldwide concluded that the butterfly effect was authentic, accurate, and viable.  Today it is known as The Law of Sensitive Dependence Upon Initial Conditions.

The Butterfly Effect is a series of short stories about people who made decisions and discoveries that affected billions of people for centuries to come. 


But the greatest story within its pages is your story: "There are generations yet unborn whose very lives will be shifted and shaped by the moves you make and the actions you take today.  And tomorrow.  And the next day.  And the next...You have been created in order that you might make a difference...Your life and what you do with it today...matters forever."
Go to the link below and click on The Butterfly Effect book cover.
http://www.simpletruths.com/movies.asp

FILLING THE VOID

There's nothing like discovering a good book to inspire a topic to write about. The Millersburg Historical Society's basement book sale once again supplied me with a treasure I can't put down. Living A Purpose Full Life is the title and it's just what I need to write about since I'm speaking on this subject tomorrow at my former church.

The book explores a woman's inner longing to find a life of meaning and purpose. Motherhood isn't enough to fulfill us: "Denise is at home with three children and enjoys the comings and goings of a mom's life. But in the quiet moments, as she rocks her crying toddler she wonders if the latchkey kids down the street (are okay). She thinks about the bag lady who was digging scraps out of the dumpster at the fast-food restaurant and wonders where she sleeps."

Women are searching for meaning in the midst of their busy lives. And although motherhood is certainly meaningful, women still long to be a light in the world beyond their homes and families.
Getting out of the house and going to work doesn't always bring the satisfaction they're looking for, which might explain why increasing numbers of women are leaving the work force. The primary reason women quit their jobs is a lack of satisfaction with the job itself. When a women doesn't feel she's doing something meaningful and making people's lives better, she'll feel like something is missing.

This sense of emptiness can affect even women who are busy being full-time moms. It also affects career women who have reached great levels of achievement: "Focusing on achievement alone isn't cutting it anymore. Women who have pushed through the glass ceiling of corporate management wonder, Why isn't this as wonderful as I thought it would be?"

For a job to be full of purpose and meaning, it has to align with our values and beliefs. For many women, that's not the case, especially if they believe they should be at home with their children instead of driving to work every day.

So what is the answer to all this? From what I've read so far, one sentence can sum it all up: "Meaning in life is not found in fulfilling divine purposes, but in a relationship with God." God created us to be in relationship with Him, and these longings we have to live lives of purpose flow from our primary reason for living...to know and love God. "This relationship with God then feeds our purposes in life...The more fully we come to know God, the more clear His purposes become to us."

If you're feeling empty and wondering, "Has my life counted for anything? What is all this for?" The emptiness you feel could be the void that God created in all of our lives, a void that was meant for Him to fill.

THE FLIPSIDE OF FEMINISM

Feminism's legacy: 'Heartache, STDs, abortion'

'It turns out human nature cannot be repealed by judicial fiat'

---

Posted: March 08, 2011
9:12 pm Eastern
By Anita Crane
© 2011 WorldNetDaily

"The truth is that feminism is the single worst thing that happened to American women."
So wrote Suzanne Venker and her aunt, Phyllis Schlafly, in "The Flipside of Feminism" What Conservative Women Know – and Men Can't Say."
And if that doesn’t elicit feminist fury or bewilderment, what will? But it's more reason for feminists and non-feminists to read this new title published by WND Books.

After all, you'll see people you know, people you love – maybe even yourself – in "The Flipside of Feminism," the authors say.  "My hope is that any person between the ages of 18 and 50, male or female, who feels as though they've absorbed feminist ideology, will read this book," said Venker, who describes herself first and foremost as a wife and mom, even though she's authored a previous book and numerous articles.

Schlafly, author or editor of 20 books, founder of the Eagle Forum, and Supreme Court attorney most famous for leading the Equal Rights Amendment defeat, hopes that the young will read "Flipside" before they make "too many mistakes.  "I want them to understand that everything the feminists are telling us is really a lie," said the widow, and proud mother and grandmother. "Feminism teaches young women to think of themselves as victims of the patriarchy. That's so unfortunate because American women are the most fortunate who have ever lived – we can make anything we want of our lives."

What, then, is this thing that Venker and Schlafly call the "F word"?  In brief, feminism is the radical agenda of what they dubbed "the Feminine Left."



For example, typically feminists seek all the powers of men while hating men and ultimately despising their own feminine nature. This is but one contradiction in feminist agenda. And once feminists declared men unnecessary, they engineered big government to take the place of husbands and fathers, the authors say.

"The animus against men is very evident in what they're doing," said Schlafly. "They look upon marriage as a dreary life. Betty Friedan called the housewife 'a parasite who lives in a concentration camp.' Gloria Steinem said you become a 'semi-nonperson' when you get married. A lot of these feminist leaders came out of dysfunctional families and they're projecting their personal problems onto society."

As the authors explain, "feminism is in the air." Liberal or unwitting parents indoctrinate their children at home, teachers push it in school and college, then in college or work, young women are taught to think only of themselves, chasing careers rather than love and family. As a result, many women resort to casual sex, spend long hours at work, and wake up in midlife realizing their lives are empty.  Other women marry, concentrate on their careers, and abandon their families with no-fault divorce, they write.

Nevertheless, Schlafly and Venker, who write in a scholarly but fluid, tough-love and maternal way, found that most women want to be married and even more want to have children.  "Heartache, broken relationships, failed marriages, sexually-transmitted diseases, abortion, and skyrocketing rates of emotionally wounded children have been the real legacy of feminism. It turns out – no surprise – that human nature cannot be repealed, overturned by judicial fiat, or reshaped by media messages," said Schlafly.

For these authors, the wreckage of feminism isn't just some study. Like many American men, it seems Venker's first husband had taken feminism to heart. "In our chapter on marriage, and in the last chapter with our roadmap, I talk about how geography is an issue for women today," said Venker. "Because so many women go away to school and get degrees so far away from home, their chances of meeting someone from out of state and then staying away are great. It's making motherhood stressful because mothers don't have support and help from their own moms. That's what happened in my case.

"We were living in New York and I wanted to come back to St. Louis, but my husband was a New Yorker and I just couldn't get him to do that," she said. "When I explained to him that family, specifically motherhood, was going to be the focus of my life and I wanted to be near my family, it just didn't work with him because he had absorbed feminist ideology: He was fine with abortion, casual sex and then he wasn't willing to move so that we could have family at the center of our lives."

Heartache isn't the only expense of feminism. Schlafly stressed that because of broken families, especially single mothers, 40 percent of Americans now depend on government for all or part of their living expenses, and that cost to taxpayers is about $1 trillion per year.  Considering today's turbulent times and tea party activism, one of the best parts of "Flipside" tells how and why the Equal Rights Amendment failed.

Yes, years after Betty Freidan told Phyllis Schlafly, "I'd like to burn you at the stake," left-wing tactics are just as ugly and violent today.  While Venker said that "feminism has sabotaged women's happiness," she wrote the book because she believes it's never too late for women and men to change.

"It's my hope that people get charged – a renewed hopefulness – from having someone open up the door to a completely different way of viewing women in society, marriage, motherhood, work and sex and all things," said Venker. "I hope that women – and men – realize that the [natural] things they're thinking are good and they're tired of having to follow the path set forth by all the feminists they've known, maybe feminist mothers or feminist professors. I hope they use this book to chart a new course."
"The Flipside of Feminism," by Suzanne Venker and Phyllis Schlafly will be available March 15.

Read more: Feminism's legacy: 'Heartache, STDs, abortion' http://www.wnd.com/?pageId=272353#ixzz1GSSv4Sk9

WHAT IS HELL LIKE?

23 Minutes in Hell


By Linda Joseph


While there are many ideas about what Hell might be like, Bill Wiese has actually been there. He has written a book about his experience entitled 23 Minutes In Hell. In the following paragraphs, I have condensed and summarized his description from Sid’s March 27, 2006 Messianic Vision interview with him:



“On a night in late November of 1998, I went to bed at my usual time, but I could not get to sleep. At 3 AM, I was still completely alert. Suddenly, I began to have a strong sensation of falling down through the floor. As I fell, I started to feel very hot so hot that I wondered why it did not kill me. When the falling sensation finally stopped, I found myself burning hot, and in total darkness. Somehow, I knew I was in Hell.



“For just a moment a light flickered and revealed that I was in a prison cell with stone walls and bars on the door. In the cell with me were foul smelling, disgusting creatures. They were 11 or 12 feet tall, with bumps and scales and grotesque distortions. They were communicating among themselves, blaspheming God continually with a terrible hatred.



“These creatures also had hatred toward me, and wanted me to suffer. One of them picked me up and dug his claws into my chest repeatedly until my flesh was torn and shredded into ribbons. The pain was indescribable. Then somehow, my flesh would all go back together, and he would do it again and again. I had no strength to fight them off, but even if I did, their strength was a thousand times that of a man. I was helpless against whatever they wanted to do to me.



“Even though I was once attacked by a shark, I had never felt pain and terror like this. I knew this was not a dream. All my senses were working properly, and I could think and reason. I knew for certain that I was in Hell, but strangely I had no thought whatsoever of Jesus, even though I had been a Christian most of my life.



“My consciousness was continually penetrated by the agonized screams of multitudes of other people. And although I was aware of people screaming all around me, there was no communication, or contact, or any human comfort whatsoever.



“The heat was unbearable. There was no water, and I was so thirsty, but you don’t get one drop of water. It is a struggle to breathe, and what air I did breathe seemed toxic, with a foul, putrid quality that smelled of sewage and death and burned flesh. You need sleep there also, but you never get to sleep either. There is no peace or comfort or rest of any kind from the torment. And you know that it will never end.



“After a while the demons let me crawl away from them, and I was able to see people in another area burning in flames in a pit. I could see their arms flailing and hear their screams, but nothing would ever get them out. That is the worst the hopelessness of knowing that it will never end, and that nothing will ever get you out. I experienced many other terrible things described in my book.



“After a while, Jesus appeared and took me into His arms. In His presence I felt such a deep, tender love and I knew I was safe. The terrible demons suddenly appeared weak and small as ants in the presence of the Lord. Jesus said, “All you have to do is cast them out in my name.” Demons have to bow their knee to His name.



“Hell was not created for people, but for the devil and his angels. The Lord loves us more than any human love we could ever experience, and the pain of what He suffers when one of His children ends up in Hell is indescribable. He was crucified on this earth to save us from this torment, but it is not automatic. Being a good person is not enough. You must receive Jesus; there is no alternative.



“As Jesus held me in His arms, we left Hell and ascended until I was above my house, and I could see my body lying in my house. Jesus told me that He had given me this experience so that I could warn people how real and how terrible Hell is. So many have lost the understanding of what it is that people need to be saved from. Believers must understand how urgent it is to warn people about this eternal suffering. The time is growing short - very, very short.



“After a while, I was sent back into my body. The instant I hit my body, the terror and pain of what I had experienced hit me full force. I began to scream uncontrollably, and I knew that if something did not reduce the horror of my memories then I would die. My wife heard me screaming and rushed to me. I begged her to pray for me, and after a long while of her praying, I began to feel calmer.”



It was weeks before Bill could talk about the experience with others. And, as he expected, he was met with some skepticism. However, from my perspective as a psychologist, Bill’s experience was real, and not imaginary or a dream. Bill’s wife Annette added this: “Bill and I have been conservative Christians, active in church for most of our lives. We do not drink or use drugs, and have never before had any unusual experiences. Bill is a steady-as-he-goes, consistent, unemotional guy. There is no doubt in my mind that what he experienced was real.”



And here is what Sid said about him: “I have checked this guy out with people who know him well, and he has credibility. I believe that the Lord has given him this experience as a warning to all those who would dismiss Hell as symbolic place. It is a very real place, and I urge everyone to become passionate to save those who will end up there if they do not meet Jesus. Get Bill’s book: it will change your destiny.”



You can listen to the entire interview by going to the Messianic Vision radio download for the week of March 27, 2006.



In concluding, Bill said that he expected many would be skeptical about this experience. However, he has a mission to tell everyone that he can about it, and wrote this book, 23 Minutes in Hell, because he feels an urgency that there is very little time left. Jesus told him two times: ‘Tell them I am coming very, very soon.’



If you would like to share an experience of healing, please write to me at at ljosef@usa.net.



Linda Josef is a Christian psychologist who is working on a book about supernatural healing with Messianic Vision. The book should be available in the next few months. If you have a story of healing that you would like to share, or wish to ask questions or make comments, you can write to Linda at ljosef@usa.net.



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YOU WERE MADE FOR MORE

www.madetocrave.org
Anyone who has struggled with food issues needs to read Made to Crave by Lysa Terkeurst.  This is not a diet book, it's a motivational tool that will make you realize why you overeat, and it will give you the desire to change bad habits that may have plagued you all your life. "This book could be the missing companion you've needed with every healthy eating plan you tried and cried over," says Lysa.  "I believe it will help you find your "want to."

Lysa confesses that she struggled with food choices and weight for way too long.  At one point she weighed nearly 200 pounds.  "I thought about, craved, and arranged my life too much around food," she said.  Abandoned by her father, Lysa began comforting herself with food as a little girl.  That emotional emptiness became a trigger for her overeating.  "Emptiness has a way of demanding to be filled," she wrote.

Lysa discovered that the only way she would conquer her cravings was if she redirected them to God.  "Nothing changes until we make the choice to redirect our misguided cravings to the only one capable of satisfying them," she said.   She began by asking God for the desire to be healthy. "I had to seek a spiritual "want to" empowered by God Himself," she said..."I had to see the purpose of my struggle as something more than wearing a smaller size and getting compliments from others."

Lysa realized that she didn't have a weight problem, she had a spiritual problem. She craved food more than she craved God.  And her sense of identity and worth were tied to the wrong things.  Her overeating was a desperate attempt to silence the cries of a hungry soul.  "God created us with a longing to be filled," Lysa says.  "It's a longing God instilled to draw us into deep intimacy with Him...If we fail to understand how to fill our souls with spiritual nourishment, we will forever be triggered to numb our longings with other temporary physical pleasures."

This book is nothing short of amazing.  Since I've been reading it, I see myself changing my own bad habits.  This book made me realize that eating in excess is a sin and being ruled by food distances me from God.  "Food was never meant to fill the deepest places of our hearts reserved for God alone," Lysa says.

I give this book five stars because it delivers a very strong motivation to get healthy and it offers an exact plan for redirecting our cravings so that we don't run to food for comfort, but instead we learn to run to God.  Women have been dealing with food issues since Eve made that big mistake in the Garden.  It's nothing to be ashamed of.  We all have issues with something.  This book will motivate you to finally have victory over the pull of the refrigerator.  It will make you realize that you were made for more.  Check out the link at the top of this post for a schedule of Lysa's web casts in which she discusses the book Made to Crave.

MY FRUGAL ADVENTURE

Today's blog entry (actually written Monday morning) is a continuation of my post on Friday about a wonderful book I discovered at a second-hand store, Frugal Luxuries.  The neatest part about finding that treasure of a book was the prayer I said before I left that morning.  I asked God to reveal himself to me as I ventured out that day to visit my favorite thrift store. I asked Him to bring something wonderful into my day that I'd know could only be from Him.  This concept of inviting God to go with me and asking Him to bring a blessing was something I learned from another great book, Twelve Days Out With God.  I haven't yet learned to make a habit of this, but that day I asked God to let me see His love for me through the things I came across that day.  I had no idea how amazingly he would answer that prayer.

As I was scanning the shelves for bargains, I came across a painting of Jesus.  Then I looked on the shelf directly above it and saw a white ceramic plaque.  It almost looked like the back of a photo frame.  I couldn't quite figure out what such an item would be used for, but after reading what was handwritten in pencil, I was too overjoyed to care.  "Jesus loves you.  Jesus loves you."  Not once, but twice I was told that I'm loved.  And a painting of Jesus stood on the shelf below as I read those words.  I put a finger to the corner of my eye to catch a tear.  Could my prayer have been answered in a more incredible way?

Well God didn't stop there.  He also led me to a book that I absolutely fell in love with.  It had me at Chapter One.  Tracey McBride helped me to remember what is truly of value in my life.  Her incredible wisdom has inspired me to view my family, friends, and home as if I were returning from a very long journey. She challenged me to find beauty where others overlook it.  Since reading Frugal Luxuries: Simple Pleasures to Enhance Your Life and Comfort Your Soul, I want to do so many things I don't know where to start.  She has me wanting to grow an herb garden.  I'll start with the easy herbs like parsley, dill, basil and oregano.  But lavender and lemon verbena will be my star herbs because they smell so fabulous.  She suggests tucking a sprig of scented herb into a card before sending it.  Isn't that a great idea?

Tracey has me wanting to transform my dingy laundry room into a place I would look forward to going.  She says, "any area in which you must spend large amounts of time should be made as attractive as possible."   She has me wanting to go through my closets, tossing out clothes I don't wear and discovering new outfits by mixing and matching what's left.  She reminded me that humor and common courtesy are necessary ingredients to daily life.  And learning to make something from nothing is magic.  I want to get out my sewing machine and create things.  I want to be more enthusiastic about my daily tasks so I can transform the mundane into the delightful.  She's inspired me to be more inquisitive because asking people about their work brings out the best in them.

If I took every piece of advice Tracey offers and applied it to my life, I would have transformed living.  I would garnish my meals with good humor and cheerfulness.  Organize the atmosphere in my kitchen with well-organized drawers and cupboards.  I'd be more into gardening because the act of nurturing a garden nourishes the soul, and preparing the bounty from a garden is the most frugal of luxuries.  "There is life, substance and joy in the warm earth that seems to draw discontent and edginess out of the soul," says McBride.

This book has been a gift to my soul and the icing on the cake was delivered the day after I wrote the review for Tracey's book, two entries ago. Saturday morning I noticed that I had a new follower on my blog.  When I clicked on the photo, I couldn't believe who it was.  The author herself, Tracey McBride had "accidentally" discovered my blog and she wrote a comment telling me how happy she was that I had been inspired by her book.  That was no accident.  Remember my prayer?  We serve an amazing God and He came through for me.  Talk about a frugal luxury!  The joy that her comment brought me was so uplifting my soul danced.  And every time I see her photo on my followers list, I smile.  Because it reminds me of my prayer and how much I'm loved.  I'll be saying that prayer more often.  Frugal Adventures await.

APPRECIATING SIMPLE THINGS

By Danelle Carvell

The subject of frugality has been on my mind lately.  So when I came across a book titled, Frugal Luxuries:  Simple Pleasures to Enhance Your Life and Comfort Your Soul, I knew it was meant for me.  I couldn't find the book on Amazon, perhaps because it was published in 1997, but I want to share some of its wisdom because this is the kind of book that could change your life if you take it seriously and try to do what the author suggests.

Tracey McBride says she wrote the book to build and reinforce the attitude that life is brimming with simple comforts,  and we don't need a lot of money to bring these luxuries into our lives and savor them on a daily basis.  McBride defines frugality as the careful use of materials and resources and the unwillingness to squander goods or spend money unnecessarily.  She says that without frugality we may be tossed upon the waves of circumstance, at the  mercy of our unorganized whims.

Frugal people shouldn't be confused with miserly people who deprive themselves of all but the barest of essentials for the sole purpose of hoarding money.  "To be frugal is to set higher standards for your thoughts, behavior, activities, surroundings and possessions," says McBride.  "A frugalite ( a word of her own making) is one who enjoys comfortable, attractive surroundings and endeavors to transform the simplest foods into a feast."

Each person who practices frugality shares a respect for the art says the author: "They view frugality as an exciting activity and seek out bargains in an almost sporting manner, finding joy in discovering a good buy and being responsible with their hard-earned dollars."  This is the part I love about frugality.  It can be a thrilling treasure hunt, and the money I save can be used to enhance my life even more or to enhance the lives of others.  It just makes sense to be discerning about handing over money that I worked so hard for. The time it takes me to earn forty dollars as a writer is more than you'd expect.  So I ask myself if an item is really worth six hours of mental toil.  Most of the time, the answer is No.

But there's more to frugality than spending wisely. We can actually elevate the quality of our lives without stressing our finances.  We don't have to confine ourselves to material things in our quest for a satisfying, comfortable lifestyle.  Some of the finest things we can enjoy in life are things that can't be perceived by the five senses. Intangible things like love, health, joy, learning, and kindness are even more satisfying than the things money can buy.  "Many people neglect to appreciate the gentle kindnesses and tender mercies that touch their lives on a daily basis," says McBride.

I'm trying to be more tuned in to the simple joys that come my way each day.  Before I go out I try to remember to look for anything that might make me feel blessed.   When I'm tuned in to these things, I experience more of them.   Friendly people at check out counters start up conversations without any prompting from me.  I discover little treasures throughout the day that lift my spirits.  Because I'm tuned in to my surroundings, I find joy in all kinds of things.  I'll overhear a conversation between a mother and her child and it makes me smile.  I'll stop to smell the roses in the grocery store instead of just walking past them.  I try to anticipate moments of joy and I look for opportunities to experience joy in the people, things, and circumstances that I come across.


 By allowing ourselves to delight in ordinary things and occurrences we can bring more pleasure, comfort and  luxury into our lives.   "Make a conscious decision at this moment to appreciate what your own life has to offer in the way of frugal luxuries," McBride says.  Some examples of frugal luxuries?  Smelling the herbs growing in the garden, the laughter of a baby, and traveling to another place and time with a hard-to-put-down book.  For me those luxuries would include the sweet taste of a fresh summer strawberry, a cup of hot chocolate with marshmallow, a good glass of wine or a warm cup of tea, and snuggling on the sofa with soft blankets, my family, a great movie, and a bowl of kettle popcorn.  Did every one of those include food?

"It has been my observation that too may people forget to enjoy these simple pleasures on a regular basis.  They seem to wait for the Shangri-la of someday rather than adjust their attitudes and sample the small indulgences found in ordinary events...There are so many outstanding experiences that are lost because people do not take the time to recognize and savor them," says Mc Bride. "By ignoring the opportunities to experience these riches, you may be missing out on the finest moments of life."

How do we elevate the ordinary and make it valuable?  Through the art of appreciation.  By consistently letting people know that we value them, we cultivate the art of appreciation.  We can appreciate our friends, display love to family, and say thank you to those who serve us like waitresses, grocery baggers, and bank tellers.  When was the last time you said, "Thanks, I appreciate your help"?  Greeting people by name is another way to appreciate them. "If we appreciate simple things, such as the people we encounter in our lives, our work, intangibles, and ourselves, we appreciate life," says McBride.

I'll write more about this on Monday, but I want to mention that the book I displayed on this page, One Thousand Gifts, is one I believe is similar to the book I'm writing about now, Frugal Luxuries.  I just ordered it from Amazon.  One Thousand Gifts is a brand new release and it's one of those things that kept popping up everywhere I turned.  When something keeps appearing before my eyes, I take it as a sign that it's something I should look into. 

I'll close for today by saying I've concluded that blogging every day is not a realistic goal for me.  So I won't be posting any lengthy type on Thursday and my only weekend posts will be written by guest writers.  So if you like my blog, become a follower or a subscriber so you'll receive notification of new posts.  I don't always post new entries on facebook as I once did.  See you Monday.   Do something luxuriously frugal this weekend.

UNEXPECTED ENCOURAGEMENT

I was going through some old papers today and came across an e-mail from Kim Alexis.  It was written on December 22, 2006.  In my entire life, I've only received two personal messages from famous people--one from Kim and the other from Earl Hamner, the creator of the long running TV series, The Waltons.   If you don't know who Kim Alexis is, you must be under forty.  She was the most popular supermodel of her time in the eighties.  Today she is an outspoken Christian woman.  She's also a wife and a mother of grown children.  The last I saw her anywhere was on TV when she was hosting, She's Got The Look, a reality show and modeling competition that featured women in their thirties, forties, and beyond.

I remember writing to Kim back in 2006 to tell her how much I loved her book, A Model For  A Better Future.  I sent her a card and she sent a Christmas photo of her family  many months later.  I remember her telling me that she responds more quickly to e-mail, so she gave me her e-mail address.  Months later, I wrote to her again at that address.  I don't remember exactly what I wrote, but I remember that I was feeling very discouraged and disssatisfied with the direction my life had taken.  I hoped that maybe she could give me some advice to get me through that difficult time.  After reading her book, I knew that she had been through great adversity and she would understand.  This is what she wrote back:

Danelle,

Hope deferred makes the heart sick.  That is probably what you read in the Bible.  I read what you wrote, and it reminds me a bit of me.  I have had years now of hanging back and "being normal" and not working or being in the business.  It would have been natural to just let it go and be a wife and mother BUT I still have this drive and desire to GET BACK OUT THERE.  I have things to say to women.  I have been put through the fire and passed the test.  Keep your eyes focused on Him.  He will give you the desires of your heart.  Why do you have this drive and desire in your heart to reach many?  Maybe God put it there.

To much is given, much is required. 
Out of great death, comes great life!!!

Keep this message and read it daily as it must be from God.  
Blessings to you this Christmas season
Kim Alexis
(See I told you I was better with e-mail, Faster huh?)

It never ceases to amaze me how God sends encouragement at the exact time when I need it most.  It could come in the form of a phone call, a card, a letter, a book, a magazine article, a song, spoken words, or an old e-mail that I kept tucked away somewhere.  God knows when we're feeling discouraged and he sends people and things into our lives to lift our spirits when our hope is deferred and our heart is sick.  Sometimes he even uses famous people to bring encouragement.

When I think about how God is able to connect people with other people who've been there and understand, and how He's able to bring encouraging people into our lives at the exact moment when they would do the most good, I am amazed by Him. I was meant to come across Kim's e-mail today.  God knew I needed a pep talk.  Perhaps you need one too.  Perhaps he also used me to bring hope to you.  In closing, I'll repeat what Kim told me, Keep your eyes focused on Him.  He will give you the desires of your heart.

ANOTHER KIND OF STUCK

Yesterday I wrote about how I was feeling stuck.  I couldn't get motivated.  This feeling was caused by physical tiredness.  Not quite exhaustion, which requires lots of rest.  I just felt a little depleted and tired of the whole routine.  Last night, at our church Christmas party, we had the pleasure of hearing a lady speak about something most of us can relate to--anxiety.  After hearing what she had to say, I realized that there's another kind of stuck--being mentally stuck with anxiety and worry that robs your energy.

The speaker shared her struggles with worry and fearful thoughts.  Her mind was stuck in a negative pattern of "what if this happens" fear and "if only I would have" regrets.  Instead of living for today, she was stuck in the future, worrying about what might happen or stuck in the past regretting what already did happen. This pattern of thinking caused her to become deeply depressed.  Her constant worry and anxiety  had robbed her energy and put her into a terrible state of mind.

She went to her pastor for help.  She also was lead to an encouraging book, Loving God With All Your Mind by Elizabeth George.  I recognized the title because I read that book and it's one of my favorites.  George says we must be faith oriented, not feeling oriented.  We should never view our lives through the lens of feelings because they are too varied and unstable.  When we feel panic, worry or any kind of anxiety we need to put our faith in God and the truth of His word, not in our feelings.

That's exactly what the speaker did to win her battle with anxiety and depression.  The first thing she did was ask God to bring any unconfessed sin to her mind so she could confess and be forgiven.  This was her way of starting fresh and cleansing her mind.  She didn't want anything to hinder her healing.  The second step was filling her mind with the truth of God's word.  She knew that she had to replace her worried thoughts with more positive thoughts.

Phillipians 4:8 was one of the scriptures she began to dwell on: ..."whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy--meditate on these things."  She said she had notecards of scripture placed around the house-- where she stood to wash dishes, at the bathroom mirror, even in her car.  Whenever a negative worrisome thought crept into her mind she took that thought captive and pushed it out of her mind.  Then she replaced that thought with the truth of God's word.

Speaking God's word out loud was another weapon she used to battle her anxiety.  Speaking God's promises out loud has great power she said.  Jeremiah 29:11 was another scripture she would dwell on to keep her mind free.  In that scripture God promises this: "I know the plans I have for you...plans for good and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope."

In Loving God With All Your Mind, Elizabeth George says God reassures us that His purposes for us are good.  Romans 8:28 says, "God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose."  We can use this promise in our prayers.  Simply say, "God, Your word says all things including this (you name the present problem) work together for good."  This is sometimes called praying God's word and it forces us to acknowledge God's involvement in our lives and reminds us that He is the source of our hope.

No matter what kind of stuck we are... physically, mentally, or emotionally, the answer is the same.  Go to God and dwell on the truth of His word.  Commit your work to Him.  Dedicate your day to Him.  Psalm 37:5 says, "Commit your way to the Lord, Trust also in Him and He will do it."  Elizabeth George paraphrases that promise this way: "Trust God to take over your career, home, work, all the circumstances, aims and ambitions of life, and He will so mold events that your deepest and purest desires shall find unmeasured fulfillment, and life will be filled with utter satisfaction"  "What a promise!," she adds. "What hope! What a plan God has for us, His children!"

CRAVING COMFORT cookbook review

My neighbor brought me a loaf of banana bread yesterday.  It's neat to know that people still do that sort of thing.  As we stood at the door chatting, the bread warmed my hand.  Warm banana bread is something I can't resist.  Two seconds after saying goodbye, I was slicing a generous end piece while inhaling the sweet aroma. This bread was made with fresh walnuts, which made it extra special because I don't add nuts to my recipe.

I love to bake, and banana cake or bread is the goodie I bake most.  It seems that every week I have three or four spotted bananas on my counter that I need to do something with before they spoil.  I recently discovered that bananas freeze very well if frozen whole or in chunks.  And my sister-in-law claims that  banana is great to have in the freezer because it can be tossed in the blender to make an icy cold smoothie.  She adds chunks of frozen banana to a pack of Carnation instant breakfast and milk. Sounds yummy!

Comfort food, that's what banana bread is.  And my favorite recipe actually comes from a cookbook titled, Comfort Foods:  America's Favorite Foods Cooked The Way You Like Them by Rita M. Harris.  This book is available at Amazon and I highly recommend it.  My Comfort Foods has many stained and wrinkled pages, the sign of a good, often-used cookbook.  I like the personal notes added by the author at the top of each recipe.  She says that Moist And Creamy Banana Cake is a very old cake recipe that was given to her when her daughter was born and is her favorite cake.  Mine too.  It's moist and delicious.  

Right beside the banana cake recipe is a recipe for carrot cake, my second favorite cake.  And the Super- Moist Chocolate Cake made with mayonnaise, that's a winner too.  Some other dessert recipes I have marked as winners are Peanut Butter Bars, Macaroons, Oatmeal Raisin Cookies, Apple Pie, Chocolate Mousse Frosting, Very Rich Cheesecake, and Oven-Baked Caramel Corn With Nuts

But this cookbook isn't just about desserts.  It also contains recipes for appetizers, breads, soups, salads, sandwiches, main dishes, side dishes, vegetables, sauces, dressings, condiments and beverages.  I wrote "excellent!" at the top of the crab cake recipe.  Also marked as good are the recipes for buttermilk biscuits, stew, potato salad, layered salad, burritos, chicken parmigiana, cheese manicotti, fettucine alfredo, meatloaf,  twice-baked potatoes, and tuna noodle casserole.

There were many days when I'd come home from school and find a pan of warm tuna noodle casserole on the stove.  That dish reminds me of my childhood.  That's what comfort food is. It's memories.  It makes us feel warm and cared for.  A big bowl of buttery mashed potatoes does that for me.  That's also my daughter's all-time favorite food.  But she prefers instant, which I can't understand.  I like real mashed potatoes with lots of lumps.  And sure enough there's a recipe for Lumpy Mashed Potatoes in the Comfort Foods cookbook.

Well I gotta go.  I have a pile of laundry waiting for me and an empty cookie jar that I'm sure I'm going to hear about before the day's over.  Hope you find some comfort in your day. 

PART OF THE HUMAN CONDITION

"People don't know what to do when the wheels fall off your life." I like that quote from The Longing, my latest reading treasure. The book is about finding your identity in Christ not in your accomplishments, your looks or anything else. In chapter six, Joey O'Connor makes a great point about brokenness and why it is an essential part of being a Christian: "Brokenness brings us to the end of ourselves. It is the very thing that brings us to our knees. It is the very thing we need to lead us to the wholeness found in Christ."

We need to give ourselves permission to be broken. That's hard to do in a society of winners who never want to appear weak, vulnerable, worried, anxious or overwhelmed. "We wear a thin veil of superficiality and shallowness," says the author. "We hide because we're afraid that if we truly open the lid of our hearts to show another person all of our fears and grief and pain, they'd say, "Yuck!"

I admire people who can be honest with their feelings without fear of appearing weak or vulnerable. There's nothing more endearing to me than a friend who openly shares her doubts, fears and pain. This is what life's about and it shouldn't make us uncomfortable. "We must accept our brokenness to find our wholeness in Christ," says O'Connor.

To find a friend who's honest is rare. Even rarer is finding a friend who allows you to be honest, especially when you're honestly hurting. Life isn't always about being strong and capable. Sometimes it gets messy and we should let ourselves be a mess without guilt. The idea that people, especially Christians, should always be strong and never struggle is wrong. The Bible is filled with stories of godly men and women who suffered greatly. "And through their suffering, God created something beautiful," claims O'Connor.

We all have seasons in our lives when we don't have it all together and we don't have all the answers. "Brokenness is part of the human condition," says the author. Then why do hurting people make us so uneasy? And why do we try so hard to hide our own brokenness? We're just not good at comforting people. We say the most ridiculous things to them. "There are other fish in the sea," is what we say to the heartbroken. "It's God's will," is what we say to the grieving. We'd be better off to say nothing.

People don't know what to do when the wheels fall off your life. But "Jesus, your broken savior understands your brokenness like no one else." Cling to Him. He promises to make something beautiful out of your brokenness.

TRUST WILL SET YOU FREE

Have you ever come across just the right book at a time when you really needed its wisdom? This happens to me all the time. I believe that God brings certain books into our lives at just the right time. It's one of the many ways that he communicates with us. Sometimes it's a magazine article or a lesson on TV. But the exact thing that I'm struggling with will suddenly appear in the form of a book, an article, a TV program or some other teaching tool.

The book I'm reading now is one that I bought a year ago. I finally picked it up this week and started reading. It's so good that I can't put it down. The book is titled, In God We Trust: But Only as a Last Resort. Trusting God should be the easiest aspect of Christian living. Yet we sometimes, perhaps often, have a hard time with it the book says. This is something I can relate to. I'm beginning to realize that the anxiety I've been feeling for the past three years has been caused by a lack of trust.

"Day after day, you and I tell God by our actions that we don't trust Him, even though He has proven Himself to us over and over again." Like many people, I have put my trust in something other than God. My constant worry and manipulation of situations proves my lack of trust. Only lately have I been able to relax. God brought this book to me to tell me what I've been doing wrong: "Don't put your trust in your friends, your bank account, your wisdom, or anything else. Put your trust in me."

"God says to us, If I can create an unlimited universe, if I can bring into existence the laws of nature, if I can hold the stars in space, if I can stop the sun from moving closer and burning up the earth or moving farther away and freezing the earth, if I can do all these things, then can't you trust Me?"

Oswald Chambers wrote, "All worry and anxiety come from the fact that we have calculated without God." When we try to work out solutions to our problems through our own wisdom and strength, we set ourselves up for sleepless nights, eating disorders, and days without joy the book points out. I'm learning that fear and faith cannot coexist and that faithlessness offends God. "Have you ever asked the Lord to forgive your sin of fear and unbelief?" the book asks.

We put our trust in so many things. We think that having money will give us peace. We put trust in our appearance and think that if we look good we will be content. We are more concerned about looking physically good than we are about people seeing the spirit of Christ in us. We buy designer clothes mostly to impress others. We depend on big incomes and big titles for our self-worth. Beauty, money, success, cars and houses are the things we seek more than God. Our materialism is destroying our trust in God.

One thing I've learned is that it's exhausting not to trust God. When we can't relax and really trust that God is who He says He is, and if we can't depend on Him for our welfare and our protection, we have no peace. Our minds become exhausted and we feel tormented. It's not the way God meant for us to live.

There's a simple formula that can set us free: "Seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well." In other words, all the things we fear, all the things we worry about and have anxiety about will be taken care of if we put God first. That is such a simple answer, yet so many of us don't live that way. We have no faith. We just can't let go of the control. We think we know better. We think we can make things happen better than God can. So we ignore God and do it our own way.

Well I don't need to be hit over the head twice. I'm heeding the message and learning the lesson. Daniel Owens wrote a great book and by divine appointment it found its way into my hands at the exact time I needed it, when I was finally ready to listen. God communicates with us every day through the Holy Bible, through circumstance, and sometimes through the wise words of others. Our struggles are often the result of our refusal to listen and our refusal to trust God.

CATCHING MY BREATH

"Lay aside your agenda for a moment. Stop striving to relieve yourself of the burdens that plague you. Rest, dear sister. Rest in the secure arms of your heavenly Father, who set your story in motion before time began."

Today I decided to take a break from all the "doing" and just "be". I'm always amazed at how God brings just the right book into my life at exactly the time I need to read its wisdom. My latest divinely appointed book is Practical Theology for Women by Wendy Alsup. The above quote was taken from it.

I've been knocking myself out with accomplishing things. I'm falling into the trap of believing that my value comes from what I do and how busy I am. That's the message of our culture. But it's a lie. Today I realized what I've been doing and I decided to spend the day catching my breath and hanging out with God. He reminded me that my value comes from who I am, not what I do, and who I am is a beloved child of God. Today He invited me to rediscover that.

Chapter 10 of Alsup's book is a chapter every woman should read. It's about finding our identity in Christ. She starts the chapter with this question: "Where do you find your identity? If you have a blog or a MySpace page, what does it reveal about how you define yourself? How do you introduce yourself when someone asks, "What do you do?"

A few days ago someone asked if I was working. I said, "Just at home." Why I felt the need to add the "just" to my response is another example of being tainted by the culture I live in, a culture that has shunned the value of homemaking. The message I hear day after day is that if I'm not busy outside my home, then I'm not valuable. It's difficult to ignore that message even though I know it's untrue. So I decide that I'd better get busy. And then I make sure to let people know that I'm busy so I can prove my worth.

Unfortunately, I'm not the only woman who does this. As you're reading this you might be having a revelation of your own. Maybe you, too, need to catch your breath and connect to the real source of your identity--the one who created you.

It is God's opinion of me that matters, not what others think of me. I know that, but I still get sidetracked into thinking I need the approval of people. I think it's something many of us do. "Many Christian women weigh their words, obsess over their clothes, and attempt to control big and small circumstances around them in an effort to build their reputation. They are constantly on guard for new strategies to make others think better of them," says Alsup.

Talking about how busy we are and how successful we are is one way to build our reputation with people. I know a woman who talks constantly about her business and her accomplishments. She even mentions dollar amounts and her latest awards or promotions. Just listening to her makes me feel as if she's trying to impress me. But I'm not the one she should be impressing. I have no power to change her life or make it better.

God is the one we need to impress. I need to remember that, too. I'm also guilty of trying to make others think better of me. But the bible says that we must let go of our reputations and rights. We are called to humble ourselves, to forget about ourselves and instead serve God and serve others. We are actually supposed to think of others as better than ourselves. Not an easy thing to do. Especially in a culture that is so self-absorbed.

My sister is a professional artist and she struggles with the promotional aspect of her business. She knows that in order to sell her work she has to promote it. She has to get it out there for people to see. But she doesn't like promoting herself. She would rather hand that job over to someone else. But paying someone to do that wouldn't be practical.

I think it all comes down to our motives. If we promote ourselves and our accomplishments to impress others, that's not right. But if we promote ourselves in order to pay the bills or serve God in some way, that's a different story. Artists have to advertise their work if they want to sell it. That's just the way it is. What matters is that we keep our focus on God and His approval. Trying to win the approval of people is a waste of time, and it's downright exhausting. We need to rest in the secure arms of our heavenly Father. That's the only place that we can catch our breath and have peace.

LIVING THE FRESH-BREWED LIFE Book Commentary

"I see women all the time who seem joyless and lonely--I can see it in their expressionless eyes. They stare straight ahead or look down, walking forward but not going anywhere. They are terrified that life is going to find them."

The above quote is part of the introduction to Fresh-Brewed Life: A Stirring invitation to Wake Up Your Soul, my latest great book find.  It's available at Amazon.  The book was given to me by a friend who said that it's her favorite book. I just love when people recommend books to me or give me a book they've read as a gift. I'm already planning to read it again because I fell in love with it too. The best way I can describe it is to say that it's a book about all the things that women secretly think but don't talk about.

Fresh-Brewed Life is a journey of awakenings: to God, to ourselves, and to others. Author Nicole Johnson has masterfully written an invitation to wake up and embrace life. Just as the smell and taste of fresh-brewed coffee awakens our sleepiness, this book will inspire you to stop sleepwalking through life, to wake up to a more exciting, more passionate fullness of life.

"Wake up! We need you as an alive and awake woman, listening and contributing," says Johnson. "Wake up your creative genius and let it out into the world. Wake up to your power and use it wisely. Wake up to your pain and investigate it. Wake up the dull old parts that are hiding from the light. Wake up to love and let it flood through you."

And what's the first step toward this fresh new way of living? "Surrendering to God is the key that unlocks the door to the life you want." Our wake up call begins in a relationship with the one in whom we began. Because only God can rouse our sleepy souls. Only God can tell us what we most want to know. Johnson discovered that life isn't about being busy and keeping it all together, it's about trusting in the One who can keep it all together.

But how do we surrender? Where do we start? Having a relationship with God requires a commitment of time. How can we discipline ourselves to make time for God? For Johnson, the answer was journaling. She learned to bring her heart to God by writing down her struggles. "Journaling became for me the tangible representation of my relationship with God and others, and my wrestlings with the world around me." But journaling should never be a pressure. We shouldn't beat ourselves up if we can't stick to it with consistency. Just don't give up on finding quiet time with God.

I still haven't disciplined myself to write in my journal every day. Sometimes weeks go by without an entry, but I communicate with God every day through prayer and bible reading. I think that's the important part, just having God in our thoughts. For some reason, I think about God most when I'm driving. The sun on my face, traveling through the beauty of His creation, and cottony clouds against a clear blue sky arouse in me a knowing that God exists.

By journaling, I make time for God and I get to know myself better too. But what kind of things should we write in our journals? Should we use it like a diary? Johnson suggests that we write down our longings, those empty places in our lives that haven't been filled. Every woman longs for something. I long to be a newspaper columnist and some day an author who brings encouragement and hope to women. I long to go to Tuscany for my dream vacation. And I long to be known and loved by the people I love.

"Dreams and longings have a way of resurfacing," says Johnson. But we are masters at killing our dreams. Instead of participating on the field, we sit in the stands and watch or we stand on the sidelines criticizing ourselves and criticizing those who are reaching for their dreams. God gave us those longings for a reason. They are the map that will point the way Johnson says. Write down your longings. "When you are honest about the places in your soul that ache to be filled, you are right where God can tenderly reach in and touch the deepest parts of your heart."

Listen to the conversations of women and you'll learn that they have many longings. We want to be beautiful. We long to be appreciated. We want more passion and purpose. We want to be known, loved, and cherished. By "known" I don't mean famous. A woman needs someone to take the time to stop and really see her. Women long for more attention and affection. That's why they become addicted to romance novels and soap operas. But according to Johnson, God is the only one big enough to hold our longings. Apart from Him we will never be satisfied.

Every woman who's ever felt lonely or empty, who's ever wondered, "Is this all there is?" Every woman who right now feels that something is missing needs this book. Fresh Brewed Life is a masterpiece because it inspires a woman to become a masterpiece by listening to her longings, embracing her beauty, savoring her sexuality, enriching her relationships, and changing her world. And the key to doing those things is to let God in on your life.

We need God like we need a good cup of coffee. He's the only one who can satisfy our loneliness, fill our emptiness and wake up our souls. Without Him we can only sleepwalk through life with expressionless eyes, walking forward but not going anywhere.

TREASURES AND GIFTS FROM THE SEA
Book Commentary

Rarely do I discover a book that can only be described as a treasure. I found one such treasure at a bookstore in Wellsboro Pennsylvania over Memorial Day weekend. Gift From The Sea was a bestseller when originally published in 1955. It was written by Anne Morrow Lindbergh during a brief vacation by the sea.

When I enter a book store, I ask God to lead me to a treasure. With so many books stacked tightly on the shelves, I rely on the title or the look of the book to entice me. Gift From The Sea has both an intriguing title and appearance as it is a small book wrapped in a cover of my favorite color turquoise with shiny silver letters.

The cashier confirmed my hope when she immediately smiled and said, "Oh this is a treasure!" She held the book close to her heart as she pecked the register keys and told me that her mother had given her a copy before she left home for college.

My treasure couldn't wait to be read. I was completely absorbed in it as my husband drove us home from our weekend getaway. And now I'm compelled to share this treasure and all its wisdom.

Anne Morrow Lindbergh was the mother of five, an acclaimed writer, and a pioneering aviator. She wrote Gift From The Sea during a brief stay on Captiva Island on Florida's gulf coast. Using shells as metaphor for how to live our lives, Lindbergh offers precious insight for women at any stage of life. "Patience, faith, openness is what the sea has to teach," she says, "simplicity, solitude, intermittency."

I love what she wrote about a woman's need for solitude: "If it is a woman's function to give, she must be replenished, too. But how? Solitude says the moon shell...every woman should be alone sometime during the year, some part of each week and each day."

We live in a world that doesn't understand the need to be alone. I've often turned down invitations because I needed time alone. But as Lindbergh observes, we are considered rude, egotistical or strange when we say, "I cannot come because that is my hour to be alone." This lack of understanding forces me to create other reasons why I can't attend. I have another commitment or perhaps a dental appointment.

Fortunately, I'm aware of my need for solitude and I feel no guilt about claiming it, but some women feel unjustified in demanding alone time and don't allow themselves that "luxury". Not realizing that solitude is a necessity, women push themselves from one activity to the next until they might fall to pieces. They find themselves in a doctor's office seeking help for stress and anxiety.

Occasional alone time is a justifiable need. I've even resorted to locking myself in a room to get it. As keeper of the home, a wife and mother is constantly on call. When she's at home she's also at work. There are children to care for, meals to make, messes to clean and errands to accomplish. Women never really get a break. They go to work and then come home to more work. "By and large, mothers and housewives are the only workers who do not have regular time off. They are the great vacationless class," says Lindbergh.

Quiet time alone is how a woman regains her strength. We shouldn't have to apologize or make excuses for it. "A woman must be still as the axis of a wheel in the midst of her activities," says Lindbergh. She discovered that even the island she lived on while writing held a lesson for living: "Unless I keep the island quality intact somewhere within me, I will have little to give my husband, my children, my friends or the world at large."

As the moon shell teaches the value of solitude, the channeled whelk shell teaches the value of simplicity. Hermit crabs claim this shell because it's simple and can be carried easily. I also prefer a simple shell. I don't need the big fancy house that many women long for. With that house comes bigger bills and more rooms to clean. If women were satisfied with simplicity, they might not need to work outside the home. They could live with less and be where their hearts long to be, at home with their children.

The first thing Lindbergh learned as a beach dweller was the art of shedding. How little one can get along with, not how much. She suggests shedding our big wardrobes for a simple selection of clothes, simplifying our homes and shedding our need for absolute tidiness. By shedding pride and not worrying about impressing others we can choose as little furniture as possible. We can even shed the false friendships we've accumulated over the years. "I shall ask into my shell only those friends with whom I can be completely honest," says Lindbergh. Imagine how we could simplify our social lives if we only accept invitations from people who truly enrich us, those with whom we can be completely honest.

Sometimes life simplifies itself. When children grow and leave home, mothers can learn much from the argonauta shell. The mother argonaut isn't fastened to her shell, it's actually a cradle for her young. When the eggs hatch and the young swim away, the mother argonaut leaves her shell and heads for the open seas to start a new life.

This ebb and flow of life is what the argonauta teaches, but intermittency is an impossible lesson to learn claims Lindbergh. "We have so little faith in the ebb and flow of life, of love, of relationships. We leap at the flow of the tide and resist in terror its ebb."

I don't deal with change well. Yet life is constant change, so why do I resist it? Like the ocean waves recede and then return to shore, our lives are forever changing and moving. But we fearfully cling to the familiar and can't accept even the natural progression that relationships must take.

How may women become depressed when their children leave the nest, believing that their life's purpose is gone when they could be celebrating the opportunity to discover new purpose, new interests and new passions.

How many women leave perfectly good relationships because that giddy spark of romantic love has grown into a deeper more dependable flame? But the passion is gone, so they search for a new partner only to find than even passion must eventually ebb toward something else, something more calm.

We have so little faith in the ebb and flow of life. One of the hardest lessons I've learned is to live in the moment, to enjoy the season I'm in and stop longing for that next great hope on the horizon. The sea does not reward those who are too anxious, too greedy or too impatient says Lindbergh. We shouldn't dig for treasures she claims. That shows greed, impatience and lack of faith. Then she closes that chapter with a thought that is more about faith than ambition: "One should lie empty, open, choiceless as a beach--waiting for a gift from the sea."