THOUGHTS AND WORDS HAVE POWER
We all talk to ourselves. Sometimes out loud when no one is around, I'll carry on a conversation with myself. I'm not afraid to admit this because I think it's healthy to talk to myself. Everyone does it, but perhaps not everyone does it out loud. Some prefer to speak to themselves only in their minds without uttering a word. Either way, it's healthy to sort out feelings, work out problems, or relieve stress by talking to yourself.
The only bad thing about talking to yourself occurs when the words you speak are negative. Negative self-talk causes depression because our thoughts precede and determine our feelings. If a woman tells herself that she'll never be happy and that her life is a hopeless drifting of one lonely day into the next, then she'll soon be too depressed to do anything about her predicament.
People underestimate the power in our thoughts and the words we say to ourselves. Most of us are careful to say just the right thing to others, but we don't give ourselves the same courtesy. We are hard on ourselves, unforgiving, and unkind. We don't realize how we drag ourselves down with that internal voice that is always focusing on the negative.
Women are especially good at negative self-talk. They put so much pressure on themselves to be perfect that they forget about the wonderful qualities they do have. If the scale doesn't read the right number or if their children aren't behaving, they blame themselves for these imperfections and scold themselves for not doing better. "I'm a bad mother," says one woman.
Another woman obsesses about her weight, telling herself, "I'm disgusting."
Sometimes negative self-talk is the result of a poor childhood. Growing up with critical parents that could never be pleased, or parents who didn't give the nurturing we needed can cause us to feel bad about ourselves. Our self-esteem is often tied to our upbringing.
But the good news is that we don't have to continue feeling bad. We can train ourselves to speak positive words when we talk to ourselves. We can catch ourselves when we think negatively and redirect our thoughts to be praiseworthy instead of critical. Then when we become good at speaking positive words to ourselves, we can take it a step further and begin to praise the people around us.
Most people don't realize the damage that can be done with negative thoughts and critical words. The way we think determines the way we feel. What we say to ourselves can put us into a state of depression if those thoughts are constantly negative. What we say to our children can ruin their self-esteem, kill their ambition, or fill them with anger.
So be careful what you think and say. Words and thoughts have power. Your thoughts and your words have the power to bring death or life to any relationship, including your relationship with yourself. Dwell on the good things in yourself and others. Train your mind to be humbly self praising. And train your tongue to be a life-giving force that focuses on what is true and good and right. You can change your life just by changing your thoughts and words.